fanfic: Deliverance, or: A Pizza Delivery Non-AU
for doughtier, who challenged me to write this at 2AM one night.
Summary: What should have been a simple training mission goes absolutely to shit, and Levi’s gotta do something because the kids expect him to pull a miracle out of his ass.
Featuring Levi Squad Mk 2
The mission has gone to shit in every way imaginable.
Well, not every way. Levi has been on a mission or fifty and he’s seen the very many ways it was possible to colossally (no wait, bad association) fuck things up, and he comforts himself that while his new squad may be made of stupid children, and they may have run out of gas and blades, and Eren has lost consciousness after fighting too many titans, and Jean’s arm is probably broken, and they are off course and unlikely to receive aid in the near future, and they are stuck in a stand of trees with about ten titans surrounding them which is nine more than Levi can probably take out without any gear – well at least he can comfort himself that they are alive for the moment.
His hapless squad doesn’t seem to appreciate this fact much. They are perched on branches of varying heights and one and all are giving him these hopeful looks, like a puppy who pissed on the floor and is looking guiltily for the owner to clean up its mess. Like Levi will pull a rescue out of his ass, or at least some food because it’s been hours since their last meal and hungry people often think of food more than titan-fighting strategy.
"It’s not fair," Sasha moans. "I joined the military so that at least I wouldn’t have to die hungry."
"I was supposed to be in the Military Police," Jean complains. He brings that up every so often when he’s feeling particularly obnoxious. It appears to make him feel better, so Levi doesn’t tell him to shut the fuck up about the fucking Military Police who are a bunch of useless murdering bastards anyway. Levi tries to be considerate.
"Nobody’s dying until Eren’s safely back," Mikasa says grimly. The implication being, obviously, that they should feel honored to sacrifice themselves for Eren’s wellbeing. Which, well, they would because Eren has his Hope-Of-Humanity fancy-ass powers, but nobody says they have to be happy about it.
They have all learned that Mikasa is best ignored on the topic of Eren, or at least humored, so nobody rises to the bait, though she gets dirty looks from Connie and Historia.
This was just supposed to be a training mission, Levi thinks. Shame they’re all going to die pointlessly and ruin humanity’s hope for a future. He’s going to be laughed at for years, assuming humanity lasts that long.